Darnell's Black Radio Guide

Darnell's Black Radio Guide - Message Bo   
my profile login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Darnell's Black Radio Guide - Message Bo » General » The Music » Singing about living unwed with kids just ain't cool!

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Singing about living unwed with kids just ain't cool!
darnell
Senior Member
Member # 5

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted      Profile for darnell   Author's Homepage   Email darnell         Edit/Delete Post 
Unwed culture stirs backlash

quote:
You hear it blasting everywhere these days: "Baby Mama," the popular song lauding unwed mothers by American Idol's Fantasia Barrino.

No surprise. It epitomizes one of the nation's most serious cultural crosscurrents: a snowballing trend of single parenthood that is provoking a moral backlash and stirring government reaction in Washington and Lansing.

While single parenthood gains social acceptability, concerned officials say the decline in marriage in the United States since the 1960s has resulted in a rise in crime, poverty and other social problems. They point to research showing that children born to unwed mothers have more social and educational difficulties, costing taxpayers billions of dollars a year.

At the federal level, President George W. Bush continues to push his Healthy Marriage Initiative. As a part of that, the U.S. Department of Health and Human services is planning a three-day conference on the topic in June in Detroit.

"It's sort of a cultural phenomenon," says Brad Snavely, executive director of Michigan Family Forum, a group promoting traditional marriage. "I think it is in many ways the result of a general message from certain parts of the culture that marriage isn't really all that important. We have separated the notion of sexual exploits and child bearing from marriage."

"The base for children is a mother and a father," says former state legislator Triette Reeves of Family Life Ministries, a Detroit organization working to promote healthy marriage in the black community. "There is a higher risk for poverty, for not graduating from college. You are at a higher risk for pregnancy. You are at a higher risk for emotional problems, for potential incarceration. Just by the elimination of one of those parents in the house. And you can't even argue with those statistics."
...
Black marriage trend

While marriage rates for all Americans have remained relatively stable in the past few decades, the numbers of unmarried African-Americans has risen dramatically.

According to the U.S. Census, 62 percent of adult whites are married, compared with 47 percent of adult blacks. In the 1960s, blacks had the highest marriage rate of any group in the country.

Today, the percentage of black children living in single parent households is 69 percent, compared with 25 percent for whites and 42 percent for Hispanics.

"I always wanted to grow up and be married and have goals," says Lathon-Bey of Clinton Township, "but you can't just marry anyone."

Lathon-Bey says the lifestyle of one child's father was such that she knew the relationship would not lead to marriage; the other father, she says, "just didn't work out."

She will be married May 28 to a man who also has children from a previous relationship. "I didn't want to continue to live not married, and we just wanted to do right by marriage."

Her children, she says, are excited about the impending nuptials.

"I don't want them to grow up and see that Mommy is struggling and (wonder) 'Is she ever going to find someone to love?,' " says Lathon-Bey, who was raised in a two-parent household. "I see a lot of families doing things together and playing together and that's what I want for my children."

She says she doesn't see the unwed mother situation getting better in the African-American community.

"I think it is a repeated cycle of what they see. I still know a lot of adolescents shacking up and you just see them as boyfriend and girlfriend, and they are having babies and you ask them about marriage and they just laugh."

That's what Family Life Ministries' Reeves hopes to change.

Reeves, along with members of several pro-marriage groups from throughout Michigan, have planned a three-day conference on marriage and fatherhood June 8-10 in conjunction with the Administration for Children and Families.

"Our society, we are so culturally into 'me' and 'my' and we are literally losing our young people because we are not willing to sacrifice," says Reeves, who has been married for 10 years.

"And the biggest part of parenting and marriage is sacrifice. And our elders have these crazy stories about only having one shirt to wear that they wore to church, and those were all sacrifices that they made to raise successful children.

"This is a not a white/black thing," Reeves says. "African-Americans have benefited from this institution through the centuries. It is in our best interest to not only save the institution of marriage but to promote and honor it."


Posts: 1673 | From: Suwanee, GA, USA | Registered: Oct 1999  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Musictheory
Junior Member
Member # 1117

Rate Member
Icon 1 posted      Profile for Musictheory           Edit/Delete Post 
Here is another point of view on this subject...

http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/opinion/bal-ed.pregnant21jul21,1,7416150.story?coll=bal-opinion-headlines&ctrack=1&cset=true

Girls interrupted

Originally published July 21, 2005

WHEN FANTASIA Barrino, American Idol winner and now pop star, released her new album this spring, two songs quickly made top singles lists and placed her in the middle of a long-running debate about the glorification of unwed, early pregnancy among teenage girls in general and among black and Hispanic girls in particular.
One of the songs, "Baby Mama," the singer's anthem to single mothers, was criticized for sending the wrong message to young fans. Ms. Barrino, herself a black, single mother who became pregnant at age 17, said she was misunderstood. She was not saying single motherhood was cool but rather that it was hard -- very hard.

That message appears to be getting through to American teenagers, whose pregnancy and birth rates have followed a steady decline since 1991 in every racial group. No doubt the credit belongs not to the music industry, which bombards teenagers with sexual imagery, but to a host of organizations, public and private pregnancy prevention programs, abstinence and sex education campaigns, and even sports programs designed to focus teenagers' attention on athleticism and self-esteem and away from parenthood.

The results have positive public policy implications, and local, state and federal governments should generously support these efforts. Successful programs also have the potential to reduce the number of people in poverty and on public assistance, and to increase the number of children finishing high school and going to college. Eighty percent of children born to unmarried mothers under age 20 who did not complete high school are living in poverty, compared with only 8 percent of those born to married mothers older than 20 who finished high school, according to the Annie E. Casey Foundation.

That pregnancy and birth rates declined at the same time abortion rates for teens dropped -- by 39 percent from 1994 to 2000 for 15- to 17-year-olds -- is also good news. Overall rates of adolescent pregnancies ending in abortion remained stable during that period, however, and increased among low-income women, indicating that more work needs to be done.

Still, more young women putting off early motherhood for more fully lived adolescence indicates that teenage girls are finding other outlets to express notions of maturity, womanhood and belonging -- and are living out another of Ms. Barrino's ballads: "Free Yourself."

Posts: 3 | From: New York | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
darnell
Senior Member
Member # 5

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted      Profile for darnell   Author's Homepage   Email darnell         Edit/Delete Post 
The source stat to me is not how many babies are had or even how many abortions. But how many people are waiting till marriage to have sex, as they should. A culture that holds off on sexual promiscuity.

I can't say Ms. Barrino has helped promote that culture, but rather worked against it despite her after the fact explanations.

Every artist out there has said "oh no I didn't promote bad activity" after they are called on the carpet about it.

Posts: 1673 | From: Suwanee, GA, USA | Registered: Oct 1999  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Musictheory
Junior Member
Member # 1117

Rate Member
Icon 1 posted      Profile for Musictheory           Edit/Delete Post 
Well, I don't think Fantasia is doing anything other than describing events that have taken place in her life in the song "Baby Mama". I don't see her encouraging pre-marital sex at all. There are a lot of things that we should do in this society that we don't and this issue is no different. The problem with teen sex did not start with Fantasia nor will it end with her. The real issue is that parents need to step up to the plate and educate their children on issues surrounding pre-marital sex. Fantasia is no more responsible for the problem than your next door neighbor. It is not my place to judge Fantasia or any other entertainer who recounts their experiences through music, film, or any other art form... We don't see eye to eye on this issue and so I'll agree to disagree with you:)
Posts: 3 | From: New York | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
darnell
Senior Member
Member # 5

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted      Profile for darnell   Author's Homepage   Email darnell         Edit/Delete Post 
My neighbor is not making material mass marketed around the globe. But when my neighbor does I'll be sure to have a neighborly chat with them.

And 50 cent recounts some of his more recent romps with women. I guess nobody should be blamed for any material they make if they all are just giving their life story using that logic. This would fully justify most trash in music today, since they are simply recounting a trashy life they or someone else lived.

Bottom line is the presentation can be done pointing out the wrong as WRONG or simply raising it up for all to see. You'll never see her make a song saying her actions were totally wrong! Till the culture and culture makers can do that the cycle continues. Some so-called "idols" only make responsible parents' job harder!

[ 07-27-2005, 09:02 AM: Message edited by: darnell ]

Posts: 1673 | From: Suwanee, GA, USA | Registered: Oct 1999  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Musictheory
Junior Member
Member # 1117

Rate Member
Icon 1 posted      Profile for Musictheory           Edit/Delete Post 
I know one thing, my parents did there job well, so I didn't have to rely on popular culture to raise me or to give me morals:) Thank God for that...and again, that leads me back to my point, if parents do their jobs and communicate with their children what is right and what is wrong, then the world would be a much better place. As for Fantasia, and 50 Cent, it is not their responsibility in my opinion to raise anyone's kids (other than their own) or to make it easier for that matter...Once you have children it is YOUR responsibility to raise your kids the right way..no matter what song is being played on the radio.
Again, I am not the judge of 50 Cent or Fantasia, and nor are you. Of course we can give our opinions, and you know what they say about opinions....everybody has one:) Bottom line, 50 and Fantasia will answer to the ultimate judge as everyone will, and that judge is God...not you or me. [Smile]

Posts: 3 | From: New York | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
darnell
Senior Member
Member # 5

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted      Profile for darnell   Author's Homepage   Email darnell         Edit/Delete Post 
What I find most hilarious about exchanges like this I have had with folks here over the years is that I have little problem explaining the wrong of things like this being presented to the masses. Everyone usually agrees that it makes a bad impression and gives many folks the wrong stereotypical ideas.

Oh but when I turn the spotlight on the actions of a Black that people "admire". Then there are always folks that run to the defense [Roll Eyes] .

So long as this double-standard continues, the complaints of Blacks will continue to look like a truck stuck in the mud spinning it's wheels. Making a whole lot of noise and going no where.

I agree it takes a family, not a village to raise a child. But we all know a family that can choose it's village will select the one with the least harmful surrondings. Until we can look at the actions of someone like a Fantasia, 50 Cent and so on and call it all WRONG. Our youth will continue to have damaging surroundings of our own making.

Yea we stop "the other man" from trying to make us look bad at the drop of a hat. And after that all we've done is allow ourselves to send each other damaging materals. Congratulations [Roll Eyes] [Eek 2] ....

And I love how folks run to the "judge not" defense when their beloved are called out. Oh but when other do something they take issue with, they don't say a peep about that "judge not" point of view [Roll Eyes] .

I don't make my statements to judge. I make them from love for a people that I see destroying themselves. And I will always do so. Although I may not do it from this venue for much longer, don't think for a second it will end folks!

Shared it before and I'll share it again: Crippled by Their Culture

America used to be much less permissive of filth in the culture. Especially folks that wanted to reference THE LORD! And the nation was one bit better for it! Sadly that has been lost. Once upon a time our Freedom of Speech meant filth was kept in check because the masses would speak out aginst it. So no company wanted to touch it! But not today.

Defenders of trash, I pity you!

Posts: 1673 | From: Suwanee, GA, USA | Registered: Oct 1999  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Darnell's Black Radio Guide Front Page | Privacy Statement

copyrightę 2004 by Mountain Top Enterprises LLC, All Rights Reserved.

Powered by Infopop Corporation
UBB.classic™ 6.7.2